Monday, May 21, 2012

The Long Goodbye

I have always loved long goodbyes. I love the hugs and kisses and declarations of love; the knowledge that both people are special to the other in a unique way. I have a penchant for the bittersweet reflections on the good times had and the changes to come; the distance that will be felt and uncertainty of the future. Will we keep in touch? Sometimes I focus on parting ways so much I don´t enjoy the time I have. These days I miss people and I don´t. I have learned to live without them and have grown used to emails going unanswered. I have weened myself off of the cyber connections that were the methadone to my lonliness and am relishing in the live experiences I have here, good and bad. I know that leaving Norway will be easier than leaving home. Waking up August 8th, 2009, I had a fist in my chest and the pounding realization that I was actually going to move to a strange country, not knowing anyone or what to expect; leaving everyone I loved in the world. It was definitely one of the harder things I have done in my life but I know now after moving my whole life here, losing love, gaining it, outgrowing people and possible professions, reflecting on my own, I have a better sense of who I am and what I want. And now, soon, it is time to say goodbye again to some dear friends who have changed my life in their own way, showing me new ways of thinking and viewing the world. I can only hope, in some small way, I did the same for them.